They Might Be Giants
Meet the Elements, 2009

It’s pretty much impossible not to love They Might Be Giants.

The cable went a few months ago (even though it’s still very much here and probably will be for the foreseeable future, considering the efficiency level of Time Warner) and tonight, the land line went away. Our little slice of paradise is now an iPhone-only household.

I am so insanely busy this week that I probably won’t notice the difference except for the fact that my answering machine will never again be blinking when I get home. Not that it ever blinked much before…

These signs can be seen on condom machines in better convenience store washrooms up and down the east coast, and they’ve always really irritated me. I’ll stipulate that abstinence or strictly monogamous relationships are indeed the most foolproof (albeit not necessarily the most realistic) means of avoiding HIV. But one does not have to be married to qualify. In fact, it’s not even a legal option for a significant part of the potential target market for this product.

About the last thing the world needs right now is a moralizing condom machine.

Doesn’t it?