Car Alarms and Such

I laugh when car alarms go off in the middle of the night.

I laugh because the alarm means there’s a good chance that the idiot who owns said car alarm will return to his car and find a broken window, or worse. At this point, he’ll be getting exactly what he deserves.

What the hell are people thinking when they install loud, repeating car alarms? Do they have some fantasy that complete strangers will hear the alarm and immediately run outside and body slam the perpetrator? Here’s a clue: when a car alarm wakes me up at 4AM, the only impulse I have is to go out and finish whatever was started. If the crook broke a side window, I’m tempted to do the rest and demolish the windshield.

Any individual with the paranoia which makes him believe a car alarm does anything but inspire homicidal rage in his neighbors has no business parking his car on the street in an urban area. Period.

That said, I’ll reveal that I actually went out in my neighborhood on a weekend night (again) and had good time (again). Twice in three weeks. Pretty amazing, huh? The crowd at Hole in the Wall was incredibly tolerable. Once again, it seems the tweakers and the slumming yuppies opted for a different scene for the evening.

I’m not about to get my hopes up and believe this is a developing trend, alas. There’s too much potential for disappointment. And too damned many BMWs with car alarms parked in the neighborhood.

Apologies to Eugene for the positive tone of one of the paragraphs here. I hope the others made up for it…

21 May 1999

My onions have sprouted.

I don’t know whether to be horrified or excited. It seemed to happen overnight. I bought a bag of onions, left them on the counter for a couple of days, and then, this morning, there were these green things shooting out the top. That’s what I get for keeping them out in the fertile ground my kitchen seems to have become.

Can I still use them? Or should I just plant them?

So all kinds of invites have arrived from people to hang out with in Seattle, assuming I can get off my butt and plan a trip there soon. Maybe around the 4th of July would be good: I’ve been informed that it ALWAYS rains then.

About this rain thing: long-timers know that I’m not really happy unless I get a couple of rainy (or at least overcast) days a week. The problem with San Francisco (and most of California) is that it just doesn’t rain AT ALL between roughly April and October. So by mid-May, I already miss it.

Soaking up sunshine is not among my favorite pastimes. Getting a tan? You gotta be kidding. Strangely enough, though, I have always fantasized about owning a convertible. Not just any convertible, but a 1966 Corvair convertible.

Completely unrelated: number one on the pop charts this week in 1966 was “Monday, Monday” by the Mamas and the Papas…

18 May 1999

Aaahh, Tuesday. Thanks to a lack of new and exciting sweeps programming on Fox, I get an extra primetime episode of The Simpsons, bringing the daily total to four. Heaven…

Sick…

So after threatening to get sick for a couple of weeks, I finally went ahead and did it this past weekend. It’s pretty much over now; I’ve arrived at the phlegm-purging phase now. Sorry if that was a little more detail than you were looking for.

Suffice to say I’m going through kleenex at an alarming rate. And lest there be trademark issues over the use of the term “kleenex”, let me make it clear that I am in fact using that particular product (Kleenex Cold Care with Lotion, to be specific) and not some other brand. This is not a paid testimonial.

Road…

This week I’m re-reading both “On the Road” by Jack Kerouac (in the bathroom) and “Mad Monks on the Road” by the Monks (in the bedroom). I sense a theme developing here. I haven’t spent any time out of the Bay Area since Christmas. I haven’t done a major road trip since last year’s second annual US Tour.

I need to be on the road. Soon.

I’m not talking about a huge road trip here; I prefer to do those in the fall. But Portland and Seattle are coming to mind. It’s been a couple of years. And my spies tell me it’s still raining in Portland. Yes, that’s a plus…

Link…

Link du jour, which might already have been a link du jour, is Nightcharm. It’s sort of a thinking man’s porn site. After all I really DID read “Playboy” for the articles when I was a kid. It’s not as if cared about the pictures…

Geekerage

It’s days like this which restore my excitement about the web. I rarely ever sit in front of the computer for hours randomly following links anymore, but today I did. Here are a few of my major starting points:

Yeah, I’m a nerd and I’m comfortable with that. This is the kind of stuff I read for entertainment. It’s the kind of stuff which got me excited about the web to begin with: obsessive information sites on obscure topics done by actual individuals with no corporate funding nor stock offerings to be seen.

I like to think I made my contribution to this field with Folsom Street in the 70s. And I’m working on a few more in my spare time, including a “Streets of San Francisco” page (on the TV series, not the actual streets) and some “then and now” photographs of certain cities.

This is self-publishing in its purest form: total narrowcasting which doesn’t attempt to reach everyone on the planet and doesn’t rely on slow-loading animations and other superfluous gadgetry to convey its message. These sites are about information, not flash. They’re about personal interests, not profit.

And Microsloth will probably never try to buy them out. Many of them, like Planet SOMA, have been sailing along in realtively low-tech bliss for years. Their creators don’t get paid to maintain these sites; they do it because they enjoy it. Here are a few which might be worthy of your attention:

Check ’em out on your way to whatever “dotcom” is having the most exciting IPO of the week…

On 1984

Fifteen years ago today was the day I realized I was falling hard. So began my first really big and heartbreaking case of unrequited love. The whole thing seems pretty trivial in retrospect, but at the time, I was a complete and total wreck. The three or four of you faithful readers who were there at the time will probably not dispute this.

Quickie version of the story: he was a friend who MIGHT have wanted to be more than a friend but, if so, he was unable to admit it. And I didn’t help the situation much with my own lack of honesty about my own feelings. And after many months of this drama, we actually got drunk and slept together. That was the beginning of the end.

Lest this sound like some cheesey “coming out” story, it’s not. We were both quite “out” at the time, thank you.

I have never been such a mess in my entire life. I couldn’t think of anything else. I let my entire life go to hell. I cried my eyes out weekly, and sometimes daily. I made my friends crazy with my depression and most of them never even knew what was causing it. I dropped out of school. I nearly dropped out of life, although not in a suicidal sort of way.

I often wonder if I EVER completely recovered from this one.

Since 1984, I’ve never let myself become so obsessed with anyone (although I have gotten moderately obsessed once or twice). This is probably a good thing, but I sometimes wonder if maybe I didn’t go a little too far in the opposite direction. I came out of it all perhaps a little less loving and giving and a little more selfish, particularly with respect to relationships.

Obviously I can’t blame every “negative” apsect of my life on this one failed romance. I was 19 years old; everything is a crisis by definition at at that age. But I did learn some frightening truths about myself from it. And this one coupling has affected every subsequent one at least in some ways.

1984 has some mighty tall and lingering shadows for me. All in all, I don’t much miss it…